(Well, on your part, at least. Obviously, what I wrote last night didn't use a whole lot of my own effort beyond spewing out what I've been thinking about for the past 5+ weeks without much cohesion or attempt to be entertaining. I guess that is what happens when you blog while you're supposed to be sleeping. Which is what I'm doing right now, too, come to think of it. I really need to get my priorities in order.)
(And in another aside, why the heck didn't they put a "Delete" key on the Macbook? I mean, there is a "Delete" key, but it's not a real "Delete" key, it's the backspace. I want a forward delete. WHERE IS IT?? Can anyone tell me?)
Let's move on to my story.
Any of us who are parents are aware of how privacy works when you have kids: as soon as they are mobile enough to get into the bathroom/bedroom/hall closet, your privacy becomes one of those things you sit and dream about during those brief moments when you can manage to tune out the yelling and running and general wildness going on around you.
That is to say, it no longer exists.
I will confess, though, that I am one of the lucky ones, at least in this respect. I have a job, which means I am usually up, showered, and out of the house before my kids are awake. I get to shower without little hands pulling back the shower curtain, little eyes peeking in, little mouths grinning at me, little voices laughing at how funny Mommy looks. It's bliss, and I am well aware of how good I have it.
On Saturday, Daddy took the Birdie out of the house before I'd had a chance to shower, and I was left alone with the Imp. Normally I would just sit around until Daddy got home and shower then, but I decided to be proactive and get it out of the way early. I turned on the TV, left the bathroom door open, and got started.
Almost right away, I heard the distinctive thut-thut-thut-thut-thut of footsteps that accompanies the Imp wherever he goes. The curtain pulled back at the corner, and he stopped, looked, and giggled. Then he turned and ran off - thut-thut-thut-thut-thut.
Less than a minute later, thut-thut-thut-thut-thut. Rustle, rustle. Curtain opens. Giggle. Curtain closes. thut-thut-thut-thut-thut.
This went on for the entire shower. He was very cute with his grins and giggles, but really, after a few times, I kept hoping he'd find a toy or the TV and stop looking in at me. I know well enough I look funny right now without the why-do-you-look-so-weird-Mommy? stares coming at me every thirty seconds.
Thut-thut-thut-thut-thut. Rustle, rustle. Curtain opens.
And then I smelled something. Actually, it wasn't quite that sudden - I'd noticed it at the beginning of the shower, and I'd thought, "Ew, gross, what did Craig leave in his shower?" After a few giggle trips, though, I realized the smell was coming and going with the Imp.
Aha. "Well, the shower's going anyway. May as well clean the kiddo while I'm at it." So I reached down for him and grabbed his little shoulders. To my surprise and chagrin, he cried out and started to whine and shake pathetically.
Me: Don't you want to take a shower?
Him: (wailing and shaking his head emphatically) Noooooooooo.
Well, okay. It scared him. But...too bad. It was going to be much easier on Mommy's aching back to not have to bend over the tub, so I decided the shower was the way to go. He'd get used to the idea once he got in the water.
He wriggled a little, and I put him back on his feet so I could get a better grip and start undressing him. Before I could stop him, he slipped away and took off. Thut-thut-thut-thut-thut-thut-thut.
Me: Come back here!
Him: ...
Me: You little Imp! Come here!
Him: ...!!!
I called for him several times, but he knew what I had planned, and he wanted no part of it. As much as he loves taking a bath, for some reason, when the water is coming out of the sky, it terrifies him.
And even though I did have to lean over the tub to get him clean, I may have learned something far more valuable: the secret to privacy in the shower when the kids are around.
It's definitely a lesson worth knowing.
The Imp and I played with the Photo Booth application tonight.
Fun times.
2 comments:
That is very funny!
You do have it good too, cause, unlike your Imp, Liam LOVES showers, even if you even whisper that you're going to take one, from 18 rooms (ok, that's exaggerating, but hey;) ) away, he somehow hears you, and not only hears you but he beats you there, AND he's already stripped himself down.
hehee! Love the pics at the end as well!
I also have it really good during the week and I love it!! Weekends definitely aren't as easy and if Scott isn't around.
At least now you know how to keep Imp away though, LOL.
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